Under The Surface
by AccountNoLongerActive1
Summary: What lies underneath Double D's hat? A curious Eddy wants to know. Double D, feeling shunned from the cul-de-sac, finds comfort in an unlikely place. Slashfic.
1. Chapter 1: Sweetness

_So, this is my first Ed, Edd and Eddy story, and I'm really excited about it :) _

_This isn't supposed to be funny, but it may have it's moments, it's mainly angsty fluff and crap. This is a SLASH FIC, don't say I didn't warn you._

_Music for this chapter: 'Sweetness' by Jimmy Eat World, and 'Opinions Won't Keep You Warm At Night' by Kisschasy._

_Let me know what you think of the first chapter, leave a review! x_

* * *

It was a morning where men would wipe sweat form the nape of their necks, and fan themselves with their caps. It was a morning where women would drink lemonade and water their flower gardens. Sprinkler systems adorned every front lawn, and young children could be seen turning the hose on each other and laughing until their faces were red. This was a good summer day for all of America.

Except for Peach Creek, that is.

Peach Creek is a tiny suburb, consisting of one of everything. One hospital, one library, primary school, high school, local pool, theatre, corner shop, people. Everyone knew everyone else in the little town, and it was a peaceful place… for the most part. A small cul-de-sac sat in the middle of the town, where only eight houses stood. The street used to be ruled by the nine preteens that lived there. But that was a long time ago.

All of those children where barely on the cusp of real life, only knowing what they saw on television, heard in music, or read in comic books, none of them knew about what it meant to be a teenager, worst of all, what it meant to be a teenager in high school.

This is a story of happiness and sorrow, secrets and lies, love and loss, the story of the once preteen children that would play in the street. The story of their high school years.

Most importantly, the story of Kevin, and Eddward.

* * *

Eddy was always an arrogant boy. Constantly trying to scam a little money from his neighbors, friends and parents. Always looking for a new way to help himself.

At first, he was just trying to get enough quarters so he could buy himself a jaw-breaker from the corner shop. Eddy used to live for jaw-breakers. The first time he had seen one, he knew he had to have it. The sterling white of the round candy, melting in his mouth into an oblivion of flavors.

Though, Eddy soon found himself less curious about the new flavours of his favourite candy, and more curious as to what was under his friends' beanie.

Eddward—known was 'Double D'—was constantly wearing a black sock hat with two white stripes up the side. Eddy couldn't remember a time where he had seen him without it. From the time Eddy first moved into Peach Creek at the age of seven, Double D had had his head covered, nothing but three strands of hear curling out of the bottom.

The kids of the cul-de-sac would try and yank it off every now and again, but Double D had been vigilant and prepared for all of the assaults. He spent more time worrying about his hat than his education, and the beanie clad boy had been intellectually ahead of his years, constantly trying to learn more, constantly trying to find a problem he couldn't solve.

Eddy now spent most of his days staring at his friends hat form across the cafeteria table, ignoring the new sci-fi movie his other friend was rambling on about. Double D had caught him staring a few times and self consciously pulled the cap further onto his head, paranoid that it would be ripped from his skull.

And even now, sitting in his chemistry class, Eddy couldn't find it within himself to look away from the striped beanie. Double D sat at the desk in front of him; the seat next to him occupied by Nazz, another child from the cul-de-sac, and the object of Eddy's infatuation.

The seat next to Eddy was bare, the teacher restricting him from sitting next to anyone due to his lack of concentration. And now that Eddy has no one to talk to, he would find himself repeatedly glancing at the devil-beanie. He knew he had to satisfy his curiosity, he knew that he needed to see what lay underneath the hat of Eddward, his oldest friend.

Eddy narrowed his eyes in a scheming manor, everyone at high school knew him as the seventeen year old boy that would do anything to get what he wanted, that, and the fact he was a jerk. Eddy didn't care; he saw everyone's disdain for him as a form of fame. He loved that everyone knew his name he loved that people would look at him with knowing eyes, more than that, he loved that some of his peers would come to him for ideas.

Now, he wanted to be known as the boy who revealed what was underneath Double D's hat. And, frankly, he didn't care who he stepped on to get that fame. He knew that there had to be _some _reason Double D had kept his head of hair out of sight, there had to be something terrible or hideous that Double D was hiding, and Eddy? Well, Eddy wanted a profit. Who knows what kind of money he could make from exposing his friend.

Eddy was wondering if he could get his second friend, Ed, to help with his plan. Ed was a large boy, built for wrestling, strong and intimidating, yet he nearly burst into tears when he accidentally steps on a lady bug, or rips a butterfly's wing while he's trying to catch it. Ed may not be the brightest bulb in the tanning bed, but his heart of gold outshined it all.

Eddy didn't have to rely solely on intelligence for his plans to work, he had grown up a lot in five years. He was no longer a short boy in blue pants with the bright yellow shirt, the boy who was trying to scam quarters for a jawbreaker, but he was now a six foot 4 inch seventeen year old who had a good frame. Though Eddy didn't have much muscle, he didn't think that Double D would be much of a challenge.

Double D had grown up a lot in five years, he more so than the other kids of the cul-de-sac. He was the same height as Ed, standing at six foot eight inches, he was still thin, but not unbearably so. He wore mostly dark colours, and a white shirt was seen every now and then, but besides the grey-scale, Double-D didn't seem terribly fond of the rainbow. He had long ago discarded his purple pants and orange shirts.

Today, Eddy noticed, he was wearing a light grey shirt with long sleeves. Anyone could see the thinness of the material, and it was modern with a hood attached to the back. His legs were comfortable in fitting black jeans, but not unbelievably tight like skinny jeans, they hung around with just enough room for the boy to be comfortable.

Eddy didn't know that double D would grow up to love skate shoes, but, apparently, he did. Double D was constantly wearing a popular and expensive brand of shoes that he bought with the money made from his job at the theatre. Today he was sporting black and white Macbeths, giving his outfit a casual formal aura.

And no matter what colour Double D was wearing, his beanie was still placed firmly around his scalp, like his head may very fall off without it.


	2. Chapter 2: 1985

_Music for this chapter: '1985__' by Bowling For Soup._

_Let me know what you think, leave a little love! x._

* * *

Eddward could feel eyes on his back as he began his walk from school to home. He knew he could easily catch the bus back with Ed and Eddy, but he liked walking, the silence offered him peace, and with Ed and Eddy around, he knew that peace was seldom.

Double D kept a steady pace down the road, his feet padding against the warm cement with a small '_thud!'_ noise. But all the while, he could feel someone staring at him, burning a fierce gaze straight through his back and onto the road beside him.

Picking up his pace, Double glanced around him, wary of what may be coming. Unconsciously pulling down on his beanie, his eyes were straining themselves to see everything, his ears listening for the smallest sound of a twig snapping, someone exhaling and a cackle of laughter. And though he could still feel eyes on him, he was greeted with silence.

Double D knew he was the target of beatings at Peach Creek High, everyone picked on him, knowing he wouldn't fight back. Double D doesn't believe in violence, it's not how he was raised. '_An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind.' _He tells himself everyday. Double D knows he has grown up the most out of all the kids. Sure, everyone got a little taller and went through puberty, but he wasn't the same boy as before.

Double D used to live for academia, and he still does, though, now he has other interests, he never knew how much music would or even could mean to him. Everyone had iPod's, and everyone loved them, but Double D more so than others. He was still kind, caring and forgiving, though he did have a small rough patch every now and again with his parents.

They were hardly ever home, and he had minimal contact with them. The only conversation they ever have are through the sticky notes his mother and father leave him before they leave at work early, and arrive home late at night. Double D can't even remember the last time he saw them.

It was when Double D turned fifteen that the shit really hit the fan. He had been feeling alone, as do all teenagers at one point and another. Yes, he had his two best friends Ed and Eddy, but he not only wanted his parents, he needed them.

He stayed up late on a Wednesday night, fed up with the way his parents treated him. He cleaned the house, washed the clothes, mowed the lawns, and never, not once, had they left a sticky note saying 'Thank you.', the only thing they ever said was 'Don't forget your chores.'.

It was around 12:40 a.m. when they walked in the door, both stopping short when they saw the fierce mask covering their son's face.

"Eddward!" His Mother began to scold, "you should be in bed." Throwing her keys in the bowl next to the door, she hung her coat on the rack and stood over her Son, trying to intimidate him. Her glared back at her and noticed his father sighing in exhaustion.

"Must you be so difficult, Eddward?" He mumbled, looking at his Son in disappointment. Edd merely scoffed and stood up on his feet, for once in his life not taking them off before stepping onto the pristine white carpet.

"And your shoes aren't even off! Honestly Eddward! Why don't you do as you're told?" His mother shot at him. Double D's anger spiked as he sneered at his elder and he could tell she was shocked. Double D's hormones were everywhere, and he was at a place in his life where he needed his parents the most, especially his Father.

"Salutations, Mother," he spat, "Just though I would let you know, I refuse to take orders from sticky notes anymore. If you want me to do something, I guess you'll have to strain yourself to ask my physically."

"Eddward James Holt!" His Father reprimanded, Double D turned on his heel and glared at the man.

"I'm being difficult, am I? When have I _ever _not done what you have asked of me, when have I _ever _forgotten my chores, but more importantly than that, when have _you ever thanked me!"_

Double D doesn't know where his anger had stemmed from that night, nor why he had suddenly felt the need to try and break through to his parents, though he knew that could not be broken.

After that night he saw even less of his parents, they eventually stopped writing sticky notes and basically left him to fend for himself. His parents had never been around, but at least he knew they were _there, _he knew they slept in the same house, ate, bathed and dressed. He didn't know that anymore.

Snapping back from his thoughts, Double D realized he had been standing in front of his house for at least five minutes now.

He sighed and pulled his beanie further onto his head, wondering where the watchful eyes upon him had gone to.

Opening his door, he immediately knew Ed and Eddy were there. Both of their shoes were haphazardly thrown to the side of the door, just before the carpet begins. Sighing, Double D unlaced his shoes and neatly put them against the wall. He walked over o the fridge, expecting the last can of coke to be waiting for him, but it was nowhere to be seen.

'_Eddy…' _Double D thought, exasperatedly. He slammed the fridge door closed and walked up to his bedroom, where he spent most of his time these days.

Ed was poking the glass case on Double D's desk. He had opted to trade in his ant farm for a small reptile. Eddy was laying on the king single bed, flipping through Double D's CD case, a can of coke sitting on the dressing table next to him.

The second eldest boy in their little group opened his bedroom door. Slamming it shut, he stalked over to Eddy, glared at him, and snatched the soda can from the table. Eddy looked shocked for a moment, a glaring Double D was a mad Double D.

"Hey!" Eddy blurted, recovering from his shock. Double D rolled his eyes.

"If you want a drink, ask for one, Eddy."

"Yeah Eddy! Be a gentleman!" Ed piped up, a giant smile on his face. Double D couldn't help but laugh at his oldest friend. Ed used to be intellectually inept, but somewhat picked up his act when high school started. He still wasn't very bright, but it was an improvement.

"So, how come you guys are over so early?" Ed and Eddy both knew to leave Double D for at least one hour after school so he could complete his homework, something Ed sometimes did, something Eddy never did.

Eddy looked at Ed, who just had a confused look on his face. Eddy sighed and narrowed his eyes at Double D, a calculating look on his face. His eyes went to the worshipped beanie and then back to Double D's ice blue eyes.

Eddy smirked and stood up.

"Time to see what's under the cap, Eddward."


	3. Chapter 3: The Ransom

_Sorry about the wait, school has been hectic with assignments and shit. if you like the update, let me know! Drop a review :)_

_Music for this chapter: 'The Ransom__' by Escape The Fate._

_x._

* * *

Eddy's carefully thought out plan crumbled beneath him, all of his plans, thoughts and schemes drifting away when he saw the beanie. It taunted him, burned his curiosity into a deep longing, he had never known anything like it.

Eddy was hoping to make a profit from what ever lay beneath the fabric atop Double D's head, he hoped that people would congratulate him, and perhaps even pay money to see what he saw. But this wasn't just for profit anymore. Yes, the thought still ambled around in the back of Eddy's head, but right now he just needed to satisfy his own jeering need.

Eddy hadn't been able to rope Ed, his big oaf of a friend, into his plan, thus complicating some things. Eddy now had to rely on himself to reveal the mystery of the beanie hat.

Double D sat down at his desk with the newly acquired can of Coke. Eddy knew it was the time.

Standing from his position on the bed, he smirked and gazed intensely through Double D's eyes.

"Time to see what's under the hat, Eddward."

Double D visibly paled, his wide eyes staring into the hazel of Eddy's. Eddy began to step forward, and Double D was already heading to the door.

'_Damn, didn't know he was fast…' _Eddy thought in strain. Ed was still standing next to the lizard case, looking at the scene before him in confusion. Eddy looked over to him, knowing he'd do anything you told him to.

"Grab him, Ed!"

Ed did so.

Double D was struggling in the confused Ed's arms with Eddy standing but two feet away.

"No Ed! No! Let me go! Please!" He pleaded to the largest of the group. Ed looked down on him with confusion.

"Ed," Eddy began with a fake smile, "we're just having some fun, you like fun, right Big Guy?"

Ed began to smile, fooled into thinking it was all a game, a sickly twisted joke of a game. Eddy was constantly taking advantage of his friends, whether it be Ed's good nature and big heart, or Double D's intelligence and forgiveness.

"I love games Eddy!" Ed grinned to him; he had his left arm thrown across Double D's chest, crushing him to his own. His right arm was free, and he began tickly Double D's exposed side, all the while emitting a carefree laugh.

"No, Ed! Don't listen to him! Please Ed! Let me go!"

Again, Ed merely laughed it off, playing along with Eddy's plan, and possibly ruining the trio of friends in a complete misunderstanding. Eddy still didn't care.

Without knowing it, Eddy had become obsessed with Double D's hat over the years. His eyes would always unconsciously trail to the beanie, narrow in thought and then the thoughts would shrug away. Eddy hadn't known how curious he could be. Not until today. This wasn't _just _curiosity anymore, it was an animalistic _need _to learn Double D's biggest secret.

Curiosity and being a complete jerk are two very different things, and Eddy seems to be dancing that line a lot. His toe was always creeping over the line of curiosity, and once that was appeased, his whole body would sprint for the 'Jerk' side.

Because that's what Eddy was. A jerk.

And everyone knew it but him.

"Come on, _Double Dork_, no more secrets," Double D stopped struggling for a moment, his wide eyes staring Eddy down, his pain obvious in his crystal eyes.

Eddy had, yet again, stepped over the line. He used the old name Kevin, another child from the cul-de-sac, used to tease Double D with. Though Double D never showed it, his heart and feelings always ached when Kevin teased him.

He hadn't done anything wrong, he tried to help people yet also help his friends, he never teased Kevin or Rolf or Sarah, so why did they feel the need to tease him?

He didn't want to admit it, but Double D knew. He knew it was because of his freakish intelligence and his obsessive cleaning paired with his OCD, he knew it was because he used to greet everyone with 'Salutations!' instead of the casual 'Hello'.

And, looking back, Double D wished he could change how he acted, how he walked, talked, held himself. And, most of all, he wished he never bought the damn black beanie on his head, because he knew that if Eddy saw what lay underneath, he'd never live it down.

Eddy's hand crept to the very top of Double D's head, and tears were staining his cheeks freely now. His hand seemed to hover for a moment, and Double D knew that Eddy was preparing himself for what he was about to see, relishing in the thought of his curiosity finally being appeased.

Double D saw his chance at escape and willingly took it, turning his right hand slightly to the left, he began to tickle Ed's side, gently at first, knowing he'd notice too quickly if it was extreme.

Ed began to chuckle lowly, and Eddy looked at him in frustration, one black eyebrow cocked. Ed kept chuckling and soon enough he couldn't hold it in anymore, bursting into a loud and rough fit of laughter. Double D began to tickle more venomously, seeing the impatient look on Eddy's face.

Ed eventually let go of Double D's chest, clutching one of his sides in laughter. Once he was free, Double D took off like Speedy Gonzales. Down the stairs, across the kitchen, out the front door, down the street, passed the store, until he eventually climbed over a fence into someone's back yard.

Inhale.

1...

_That was close._

2...

_He nearly saw._

3...

_How could he do that to me?_

4...

_Jerk._

5...

Exhale.

He didn't know who's yard it was, but at the moment he couldn't care. He felt relief, betrayal, panic and just a little bit smug.

How could Eddy do that to him? He was his best friend, and they had a bond, an understanding, and, what Double D thought at the time, a friendship and now it was a as clear to Double D as it was the rest of the cul-de-sac. Eddy was a jerk.

His panting began to cease, and he could nearly stand up straight when he heard his name.

"Double Dork."

Frozen. Numb. Ice. Dead.

Double D slowly turned on his heel, his sapphire eyes meeting the mahogany of Kevin, childhood bully and the creator of repressed memories.


	4. Chapter 4: Everything's Magic

_Hey, sorry about the short wait. But my other story 'Carpe Noctem', has right of way against this one._

_I'm trying to move the story along quickly, not wanting a story that goes for 8725923507856 chapters._

_Hope you like it :)_

_Music for this chapter: 'Everything's Magic', by Angels and Airwaves._

* * *

The breathing Double D had just gotten under control spiked and whirled, heaving through his lungs and out of his lips in petrified gasps. His beanie was soaked from sweat, as was the front of his shirt. Looking down at his bare feet, Double D saw traces of dirt, grass and some blood.

_Great, _He thought, _Kevin has only looked at me, and I'm already bleeding._

Kevin looked at Double D in confusion and frustration, his mahogany eyes glaring a hole through the teenagers head.

"Why the hell are you in my yard?" Kevin sneered. Double D paled more and started to stumble through an answer, trying not to reveal too much.

"I thought this was…ah…Jimmy's house! And I just wanted to…um…"

Kevin's thin patience tore, and he grabbed Double D, holding him up by the collar of his shirt.

"Why are you in my yard?!" He snarled.

Double D looked on in fear. His fear of Kevin used to be miniscule, but when they got to High School and started growing up, Kevin showed to be one of the boys who didn't care who they hurt or trod on, not as bad as Eddy, but worse in their own way.

"Tell me. Now."

With a squeak, Double D told the story of Eddy's betrayal, his close encounter, and, finally, why he was standing in the middle of Kevins backyard.

To his utter surprise and astonishment, Kevin began to laugh. However it was not a carefree, friendly laugh, but a bitter, cold and mocking one.

"Well, doesn't that just beat the shit out of everything."

Double D flinched at the language, he may have grown up a lot, but curse words still got to him every now and then.

Kevin straightened his posture and narrowed his eyes at Eddward. He took a predatory step closer to the boy.

"I've been curious about that hat too, Double Dork."

The beanie clad seventeen-year-old cringed from the hand inching towards his cap. He needed to get out of this situation as quickly as possible, yet his advanced mind could divulge no escape route.

It was when he saw the look on Kevin's face that he knew it was over.

Pure curiosity, and a little malice awaited Double D in Kevin's eyes. The facial expression of great longing staring at the beanie. Double D couldn't fight it, he knew what was coming. He knew that Kevin would never let him live it down.

And yet, it didn't hurt as much.

Double D had considered Eddy a friend, and the betrayal of that nearly felt too much for him to bear. Double D had known Eddy since he was a child, they grew up together and had good and bad experiences. They did everything together.

And they would now probably hate Kevin together too.

For different reasons, obviously.

Eddy because Kevin had revealed what was under Double D's cap before he had, because he had unlocked something that may or may not bring a gold mine to his house. Eddy would hate Kevin because he would have what he wanted.

Double D would hate Kevin because he could.

Because Kevin was a mean, greedy, merciless thug. And he always got what he wanted.

And he wanted to see what was under Double D's cap. And both the boys knew that nothing could stop him.

It was with that revelation that Kevin yanked the beanie from the terror stricken Eddward, both of the teens awaiting Kevin's reaction.

* * *

Kevin couldn't describe to you what was underneath Double D's hat. He couldn't quite comprehend it himself. He was expecting to see something mutant, foreign and unexplainable.

But it was just hair.

Hair that was the darkest shade of red Kevin had ever seen.

The red was so dark, it was bordering on the colour of his blood. Kevin had never seen anything like it.

You could tell Double D's hair was soft just from looking at it. Each strand was clean and expertly washed, and being so close to his hair, Kevin could smell the coconut scent the shampoo left behind.

Despite everything Kevin had said to Double D, he wanted more of that coconut smell.

He wanted Double D's coconut scented hair, he wanted to see the dark red every day, and he wanted to see what the hair looked like when it grew below his ear. Kevin wanted everything that the hair teased him with.

And he didn't know why.

He didn't know why he had this curiosity about the academic Eddward ever since he met him. Out of all three Ed's he was the least offensive, the least likely to try and take Nazz away from him.

But maybe Kevin wanted Double D to take _him _away.

Moisture on his hand brought him from his jumbled mess of thoughts.

He looked down at his hand, curled tightly around the collar of Double D's grey shirt, the fabric bunching in his fist. Kevin's right hand still held the black beanie, fresh from Double D's head.

Inspecting his hand a bit more thoroughly, Kevin saw that more moisture was dripping onto it.

But it wasn't just any moisture.

They were tears.

And they weren't just any tears.

Double D's.

Kevin let go of the shirt, making Double D stumble a bit. He hadn't any idea what he was doing, why he treated Double D so much worse than others.

But he blamed Double D for making him feel this way. He blamed Double D for confusing the hell out of him since he hit puberty, he blamed Double D for making him question everything he has ever known in his life.

He blamed Double D for feeling making him feel this way.

Because he knew he shouldn't feel this way, it was completely irrational. He loved Nazz. No. He love_s _Nazz… Right?

Ad far as he knew, he did.

But Kevin was starting to question how far he actually knew.

He had meant to intimidate Double D, to make him feel like nothing had changed in between the two of them, to make him feel like Kevin had always made him feel.

But he had never made Double D cry.

Nor had he ever meant to.

And right now, staring at Double D's tear stained face, he felt a tightening in his chest, a rumble in the back of his throat, and red paint his vision.

He had made him cry.

_He _had made him _cry._

And, for some unknown reason, the mere thought of that had butterflies swimming in his throat, guilt and regret sweeping over him. Kevin's auburn hair swayed in the slight drizzle that had taken over the once sunny climate.

Double D had shaking hands, and the unfamiliar and unwelcome feeling came back to Kevin, and he was finding himself wanting to soothe him, to calm him.

But he knew he wouldn't.

More than that, he couldn't.

He couldn't treat the intellectual being that way, kick him down and then soothe him. He couldn't take everything away from him and then try to give it all back. It doesn't work that way. Life doesn't work that way.

But Kevin severely wished that it did.

He shook the thought away, raising one of his hands to his temple, Kevin pinched his eyes closed, willing the thoughts away. Trying to rid himself of his stupidity. When he opened his eyes again, he found himself glaring at Eddward.

It _was _all his fault.

Kevin had never even had a question in his mind about his sexuality. And then two years ago, he took the time to look at Double D. Not just seeing the boy, but _really _looking at him.

And for the first time in his life, Kevin saw the Ed that some strange girls saw.

He didn't see the weird kid down the street, who used to have a fascination with ants. He didn't see the obsessive compulsive cleaner that he once was, nor did he see the weirdo with the beanie.e definitely didn't see the boy who wore purple shorts with an orange shirt.

He didn't even see Double Dork.

He saw a tall young man with eyes deeper than the sea, he saw the light and lanky muscle underneath the white sleeves of his shirt. He saw the calf muscles coiling under the dark wash jeans as he prepared to jump, the way his eyes would light if _anyone _asked him for help with their homework.

For the first time in his life, Kevin saw Eddward.

And he wished he hadn't.

And now, looking down on the silent boy, Kevin clenched his fists, took one last look at the blood-red hair, gripped the beanie ever tighter.

And walked away.


	5. Chapter 5: Lead Sails And A Paper Anchor

_Music for this chapter; 'The Music of the Night', by Andrew Lloyd Webber and 'Lead Sails and A Paper Anchor', by Atreyu._

_I hope this chapter lives up to your expectations, and I'm happy to say this chapter lays on a cliff hanger :)  
Let me know what you think, leave a review! x._

_P.S. I have made four banners for this story and posted them on my website, the link to said website is on my profile :)_

* * *

Double D began to breathe normally again once the back door to Kevins house was slammed shut. To his utter relief, Kevin had not pointed and laughed, nor had he mocked and beaten. He had just stared, and left.

With his beanie still clutched firmly in his grasp.

The beanie that concealed Double D's blood red hair.

The hair he had hidden from the world for so long.

Double D didn't think his day couldn't get any worse.

And, as if by some strange occurrence, it then began to rain.

Double D didn't move.

_Couldn't_ move.

It as simply an impossible act at this point in time. There was no motivation behind it.

No emotion.

No thoughts.

Nothing.

Just like Double D would be if the kids of the cul-de-sac found him hat-less.

The stares.

The whispers.

The jokes.

The taunting.

The beatings.

He couldn't handle that.

He wasn't built to handle that.

Unlike many other boys in the street, Double D hadn't grown into the 'macho-man' exterior you see everywhere these days. He was still a shy young man, trying to get through the day without tripping over his own two feet.

Most days he succeeded.

But today, he not only tripped over his on feet, but onto burning hot coals of betrayal and loathing.

Suddenly remembering the second threat to him, Double D jumped to his feet, his head swiveling from side to side to search for the top of Eddy's head.

Appeased that he had found no betraying, backstabbing ex-friend, Double D began to think of his options.

Option one: Politely ask Kevin to return his beanie.

No.

Option two: Strut down the street like nothing is different, ignoring the stares and taunts thrown his way.

No.

Option three: Hide in the oak tree in Kevin's backyard until dark, then slip home with no one the wiser.

Yes.

Carefully and quietly, Double D crept to the large tree that was in the right backhand corner of Kevin's spacious yard. He felt it when the tree cut hit palm as he was climbing, he felt the blood trickle down his hand, wrist and arm, the exact colour of his hair.

But he paid it no mind.

If this were any other day, any other situation, Double D would definitely be a flurry of movement, streaking through his home to get band-aids, antiseptic cream and anything he could think of. He'd make sure that no blood had fallen onto the carpet, and if some had, he'd clean it straight off.

But this wasn't any other day, it wasn't any other situation.

He was stuck in Kevin's tree, shaking from the cold, rocking himself backwards and forwards trying to get some sort of friction.

It's said that you heat up faster if you take off your clothes.

This is the only time Double D had found himself disagreeing with that statement.

He couldn't believe where he was, what he was doing and why he as doing it.

The day started off fine, like any other Friday morning. Kids at school were buzzing with the prospect of the weekend and whatever it entailed for them, Saturday night football had a lot of the boys eager with excitement, wanting the team they supported to make it to the final round.

Double D walked to school a lot faster, hoping that his good mood would not sour.

His mood didn't sour, it spiked, curdled and rolled over in its grave.

To say the day ended fine, would have been a lie.

Double D was still trying to decipher what had happened in Kevins eyes.

He remembers his vision blurring from tears, and then being able to see once they had leaked down his face. Kevin's eyes held nothing but cold malice, but when he looked into them again he saw confusion, anger and… regret? Double D couldn't pinpoint what was happening underneath the surface of Kevin's brown irises.

He only knew it was enough to make him question everything he has ever known.

He had always been terrified of Kevin, and Double D had always assumed it was because of the brute strength and careless attitude he carried towards people's well being that put him off the lad.

But he was terrifying because he was _different._

Double D looked at other boys and saw either annoying brats, spoilt whingers, scheming arrogance or pityingly stupid.

But when he looked at Kevin he saw the real thing.

He didn't see an arrogant fool ho just wanted to hit people, he didn't see the coveted boyfriend of Nazz, the 'it' girl, and a very kind and generous person. At the time he thought he just didn't care about Kevin, that he had known him too long to formulate any sort of opinion.

It wasn't until three weeks ago that he realized he _did _have an opinion, a much stronger opinion than he should have.

They had been at the locker rooms at school, changing out of their sweaty gym clothes and into their regular outfits. Kevin had been asked to stay behind to talk to the coach about the upcoming baseball try-outs. Double D had been held back because he didn't do enough push-ups.

Thus left the two boys alone in the locker room.

Double D remembers seeing Kevin out of the corner of his eye, pulling his drenched green shirt over his head and flinging it into his bag. Without moving his head, Double D examined the flesh before him, the intricate muscles that danced in the bone structure known as Kevin's back. The way his shoulders moved as he pulled on anther shirt.

Double D only remembers thinking one thing.

_Why am I looking?_

And now, sitting perched in an oak tree, Kevin barely fifty meters away from him, Double D had another thought.

_Why do I care so much?_

* * *

The sun had gone down a while ago, and checking his watch in the small moonlight, Double D saw it was 10:45 p.m. the perfect time for him to escape.

Through the rain, Double D slowly dangled his legs over the branch and estimated the height to the ground. Satisfied that the drop would not brake his legs, Double D pushed off the branch, whistling through the air and thudded to the ground. His right ankle was a little sore from the impact, but he would just put some ice on it when he got home.

Hobbling towards the fence, Double D took one last look at the house before him, easily noticing Kevin's room from the bright light seeping through the curtains, he didn't know what it was about Kevin that made his mind whirl, or why he was more scared of the boy himself than the pummeling he may receive.

Double D only knew that he needed to figure this out soon, or it may just drive him insane.

Double D propelled himself over the fence with his lanky arms. Landing softly on the other side, his right ankle groaned in protest. Double D swore under his breath and bent down to cradle it, gently rubbing the sore tendons.

As much as he wanted to sit down for the rest of his life, Double D knew he had to keep moving, as positive as he was that no one was out this late at night, he knew that Eddy was relentless when he wanted something. And right now, Eddy wanted Double D to suffer.

And suffering he was.

Limping slowly down the cul-de-sac, the Edd tried to make as little noise as possible, not wanting to draw anyone's attention to his dark figure. He kept to the shadows and stayed out of the street lights.

And if he didn't get his beanie back from Kevin soon, he knew that he'd have to stay in the shadows for the rest of his life.

A lone tear slid down Double D's pale cheek, he didn't know what he was crying for, he only knew that now was not the time.

He picked up his pace when Eddy's house came into view, only to stop suddenly when he saw a light on and a window open.

Eddy wasn't watching—he was listening.

Another curse slipped from Double D's lips as he got down onto his knees, eventually laying flat on his stomach, he knew this was going to hurt, but it was the only way of getting past Eddy's house without notice.

With a sigh, Double D began to slowly worm his way across the pavement, one eye looking out for rocks and insects, the other constantly at Eddy's window, watching for any sign of life behind it.

Double D could feel his stomach becoming grazed, and he felt the sting as more gravel entered the wound. The thin fabric of his favorite shirt began to wear thin, and he knew that this would be the last time he would be able to wear the grey hoodie-shirt.

He got past Eddy's house but continued to worm across the ground, not trusting his instincts that all danger was gone. He wanted to be positive, he wanted to be safe.

Double D made it to his house and sighed in not only exhaustion, but pride too. He had successfully gotten away from Kevin the menace and into the safety of his own home.

He was safe.

Or so he thought.

Cringing, Double D turned to the car that had just pulled into his driveway.

Looking through the relentless rain, Double D came face to face with his parents.


	6. Chapter 6: The Scene Is Dead

_I wasn't going to post this chapter until Tuesday, but it was just screaming at me to be posted.  
I hope you like it as much as I do :) Let me know, leave a review!_

_Music for this chapter; 'The Scene Is Dead; Long Live The Scene', by Cobra Starship._

* * *

Double D stood stagnant, staring with wide eyes at his mother and father, both of whom had not noticed him yet.

He knew that this would end badly, and he had already been on an emotional rollercoaster today, he couldn't stand to be angry again.

Double D swivelled his head from side to side, looking for any escape route. It was the third time tody he needed to get himself out of a bad situation, and the sadness of that was not lost on him. Double D began to ease his way backwards, finding the doorknob, only to curse whoever locked it.

The rain was pouring onto Double D's cut and he momentarily relished in the stinging subsiding. His mother and father were out of the car now, and running to the trunk to retrieve umbrellas. Double D saw it as a god send when his father dropped his keys, Double D saw his chance.

Dropping onto the muddy ground, Double D rolled on his stomach and into the near-by shrubbery. He felt thorns in his skin from the rose bush he planted last year, and immediately regretted ever wanting to garden.

He watched the feet or his parents walk hurriedly towards the front door, and he heard the clicking of the locks as they came undone. Double D's heart was pounding in his throat and blood was rushing through his veins, the adrenalin he had always kept under control spiking without his consent.

The front door clicked shut and Double D let go of a painful breath. Taking one last look around him, Double D gingerly picked himself up from the ground, wincing slightly at the sting from the new cuts received. Looking at his house, Double D saw that most of the lights on the first floor where on.

Out of all the people Double D wanted to keep his hair hidden from, his parents where on the top of the list. As soon as his hair had started to grow, he remembers being given a beanie. The last time his parents saw his hair was when Double D was eight and getting out of the shower, his father had walked in unexpectedly, and only caught a glimpse of red before it was covered.

Double D knew he couldn't go through the front door, that would be like suicide. The next and only option he saw was climbing through his window, knowing that his parents wouldn't come and check on him.

They never did.

And through all the emotions Double D had been feeling, sadness was the most prominent. Yes, he had never had a good relationship with his parents, but that didn't mean he didn't _want _to. He wanted to talk and do activities with his father, he wanted to help his mother in the garden, but they were constantly pushing him away.

He shook from his thoughts and shuddered from the rain. It was beating against his skin, in sync with his pounding heart and heated adrenalin. For a moment, it provided a cool warmth against his aching body, and he let himself slip into the brilliance of the rain.

He had never liked the rain, and, as he was walking to the fence leading to his backyard, his mind was a torrent of thoughts. _Why do I suddenly like everything that had ever repulsed me?_

Yes, taking a sudden liking to the rain was different from taking a sudden liking to the local bully, Kevin, but it was all the same in Double D's mind.

_Oh well. _Double D thought, _If it rains on my parade, I'll dance in it._

Suddenly, the Edd found himself grinning like a mad man at the sky, water dropping into his eyes and adding to his happiness.

Double D immediately ruled out using a ladder to get to his second story window. The slippery surface paired with his aching and almost lethargic limbs was an equation for disaster. Steeling himself, he got a tight grip on the drain pipe leading from the gutter on the roof. Placing both of his feet on either side of the pipe, he began the slow and torturous climb.

He felt the cut on his palm become even deeper as he slowly moved his way up, the little moonlight that there was began to shine on the dark trail Double D's blood left behind. He knew that he'd have to clean it later and, for once in his life, he was not looking forward to it.

After several minutes of torturing his muscles, Double D made it to his window. Placing his right hand on the glass, he tried to push it open, but it wouldn't move an inch.

_That's odd, I always leave the window open… _It was true. Double D loved the smell of the morning air, and couldn't stand to have a stuffy room. He didn't remember locking it, he had left the house in his haste to get away from Eddy.

Eddy…

Double D narrowed his eyes as his removed his hand from the glass, the only evidence of him being there was the hand print he left behind. His briefly wondered if his parents _would _come and check on him, see the blood print, and call 911.

But that thought didn't sit with him for long.

Double D knew his parents would do anything _but _check on him, and besides that, the rain would wash all of the blood away by morning.

Crawling along the ledge of his window, he peaked carefully into the one besides his, into his parents' room.

They were both still downstairs, and pushing against the glass, Double D discovered that their window was locked too.

Double D crawled, slid and climbed around his house, trying to find _some _way of breaking in, some way to get out of the cold, wet night. But, finding that no window was unlocked, and every crawl space was blocked, Double D discovered that Eddy had done his homework.

And that he would stop at nothing to see Double D's hair.

His blood red hair was completely black in the night, drenched by rain and sweat. If Eddy saw him now, he'd have nothing to lose.

But, knowing Eddy, he'd see through it. The guy was a mastermind at deception, and could pick a lie out from a mile away.

Which thoroughly screwed Double D.

Trying to see his watch in the moonlight, Double D saw that it was 10:53 p.m. and the front light to his house were being turned off one by one, silently cheering in his mind, Double D waited until all the lights were off and snuck forward to the door.

Trying to be as silent as possible, Double D gently put his hand around the copper knob, turning it inch by inch until the door unlocked.

Click!

_Oh no._

Click! Click! Click!

_No, no. No, no, no, no!_

Click! Clic—thump!

Double D had banged his fist roughly against the locked door, cursing its existence, and his parents, the one night they decide to lock the front door.

It was official, Double D was stranded outside until further notice.

Alone.

In the dark.

Alone.

Soaking wet.

Alone.

Scared.

Alone.

Hot tears pounded his cheeks as his heart leapt to his throat. He had no where to go, no place to keep him warm. And, at the moment, he didn't care who saw his mutant hair.

Trekking down the street, Double D scuffed his feet and scratched at his itchy wounds. The one on his right palm was definitely bothering him. And he knew it was going to be nastily infected by morning, as were a lot of other cuts and bruises he had acquired.

He needed a place to stay, somewhere he would be safe and not in danger of anyone finding him.

Without his knowledge, his feet had taken him to the back fence of Kevins property. It was a large place, though the house was small, the back yard stretched for a few hundred meters. He stared at the oak tree he had hidden in hours before, and, out of the corner of his eye, he saw another.

It was an oak tree, perhaps the brother to the one he had hidden in. Only this one was different, it was taller, thicker, and, most importantly, it had a little cubby house hidden in its vegetation.

Double D's once lethargic muscles sprang to life, and before he knew what he was doing, his body was over Kevins fence and was climbing the tree like a professional.

Once inside the cubby house, Double D collapsed to the ground, tears of relief spilling from his eyes.

He knew he was safe here. This was Kevins yard, no one wanted to anger Kevin.

Double D knew that if he was found, he'd be beaten to the ground, but at this point in time, he didn't care. His day had been terribly horrible, and getting beaten up wouldn't change that.

Adrenalin stopped pumping Double D, and he soon found himself grow weary and tired. With a yawn, his eyes slid shut, and he couldn't find the strength to open them.


	7. Chapter 7: Haunted

_Craaaap. I'm sorry. I know how long it's been since I'm updated. Hopefully this will satisfy you readers._

_Music for this chapter 'Haunted', by Evanescence, and 'Stricken', by Disturbed._

* * *

Double D's eyes flew open. A layer of sweat covered his forehead and was slowly trickling across his brow. His ripped grey shirt was soaked and the beads at the nape of his neck stung his wounds. Sweat soaked into his eyes and he gasped softly at the burn.

Double D rubbed his eyes, trying to alleviate some of his pain. Every muscle in his body was aching, twisting and writhing in what they had each gone though. His skin was pale and bruised. Cuts marred his cheeks and neck, his legs and arms, and the smell of dry blood was nearly making him heave.

Looking around, Double D tried to shake off his nightmare. But no matter how much he tried not to think about it, it wouldn't leave his mind. The small and dainty window of the tree house reminded him of the hole he had been falling through. The cobwebs on the ceiling weren't really cobwebs, but the webs of the venomous spider waiting at the end of the drop. The splinters in his finger weren't there from carelessness, but they had been placed there roughly by a deformed Eddy, ready to take his revenge.

But the worst part though out his whole nightmare, was that there was nothing atop Double D's head. His black beanie was no where in sight. His security and confidence was eclipsed, his small bravery and large intelligence were not found. The black sock hat held everything for Double D and more—he couldn't live without it.

And why Eddy thought he could was astoundingly confusing. Why Eddy thought it was okay to try and humiliate his friend, merely to satisfy his own curiosity was disgusting.

_Had I not made it impeccably clear, _Double D thought, _that I didn't want anyone to see my hair?_

Doubt ran through his mind. _Maybe this is my fault… Maybe Eddy isn't the bad guy._

Double D sighed and looked at the ceiling, trying to expel the frightened thoughts of the cobwebs from his mind. Looking around more clearly, Double D saw that Kevin's tree house was in a serious time of need. The wood was chipped and soft, and the ladder that used to be connected to the door was frayed and unsafe.

_Kevin really should clean this place up…_

Double D's relaxed eyes bulged, and he choked on sharp intake of breath. He suddenly remembered where he was, and why he was there. Words couldn't describe how Double D felt, they were merely not adequate enough to portray his anger and panic.

_Eddy… Parents… Dark… Alone… Kevin._

He gasped, feeling his throat clear from his dry heaves in his anxiety. _Kevin, Kevin, Kevin, Kevin._

Double D's muscles groaned and protested as he rushed to stand up. He nearly fell back onto his knees when he heard a crack in his left leg. He bit his lip hard and spat out the blood that came—the wound would heal quickly. He stumbled over to the small door of the cubby and noticed that the sun was just barely rising. Double D knew that he would have enough to time to get home.

Lowering himself onto the side of the cubby, Double D prepared himself for the horrendous climb downwards. He gingerly set his feet on the nearest branch and began his own personal hell. Despite everything that had happened to Double D over the past fourteen hours, he believed this to be the worst torture of all.

He finally reached the ground, and he looked towards Kevin's house to find any sign of life. Satisfied that it's occupants were still asleep, Double D climbed over the fence, and began the journey home.

It was too early for anyone to be out, so Double D was confidant in his light jog to get himself home. He knew that his parents left for work before the sun even rose, and they always left the door unlocked.

He jogged across the oncoming intersection, not even stopping to check if any cars were coming. A bird chirped in a tree over Double D's head, and he stopped momentarily to listen to it's song. It was soft and slow perfect for this time of morning. The bird's soprano had called to the other wildlife, as another bird swooped to the branch below it to join in. Double D sighed and began walking again, jumping his back fence, Double D knew he was safe.

He walked over to the back porch and sat on the cool pavement. He was guessing that he had gathered around four hours sleep—Double D had never been so happy that I was Saturday. He had already made plans in his mind about what pillow he would sleep with, eliminating each one until he thought of the softest. Kevin's tree house was not very comfortable.

He moved to get up, placing his right hand on the pavement next to him, though Double D didn't experience the cold granite like he was preparing himself for. Instead he felt something that was lukewarm, and obviously made of fabric. Looking down, Double D saw his life line.

Picking it up in his hands, the Edd twirled his hat around his finger, all the while smiling giddily. The fabric would bend around his finger, and at one point nearly flew off. Double D sighed and placed it back on his head. Relishing in the warmth and comfort it brought with it.

Double D had been feeling almost naked without his beanie on, and now, he could finally be at ease. Right now, Double D didn't care who saw him, torn clothes, bruised body and all. He would brush off their questions, as none of them would matter. Double D felt safe.

_I _am _safe, _He thought.

He got up with a hearty groan, still feeling the strain in his left leg becoming worse.

_Perhaps I pulled a muscle… Or perhaps I broke my ankle…_

Possibilities ran through his head as he made his way over to the gate that led to the front porch. He pulled on the rusty bolt, cringing when the squeak of metal rang through his ears.

_It's far too early for such an ungodly noise…_

Double D sighed and closed the gate behind him, limping over to the steps, Double D nearly cried when the doorknob to his front door turned without protest. He very nearly slammed the door behind him, making sure to lock it—as he did with the back door—Double D didn't take off his shoes, didn't check to see if he was tracking mud on the carpet, didn't check to see what the rare yellow sticky note said.

Double D merely hobbled up to his room and collapsed onto his bed. He sighed when his head hit his green pillow, and his matching quilt was thrown over the top of his body. Double D fell into a deep sleep, a smile constantly on his face.

Double D didn't even notice the dark pair of eyes watching him like a hawk through his locked bedroom window.

* * *

_I'm sorry about the filler, but these things take time. I'd feel bad if Double D didn't really ever get to rest. But don't worry, the storm is brewing ;)_

_I'm actually kind of curious... who is your favourite 'Ed, Edd and Eddy' character? Mine's all three of the Kanker sisters. They're freaky. I love it._

_Let me know what you thought of the chapter, leave a review! :)_


	8. Chapter 8: Ignorance

_Damn, I'm so sorry about the delay; life got a bit too real for a while._

_This chapter doesn't really take the story anywhere, though it _is _important. I hope you all like it, if you do, leave a review (;_

_I'm sorry about any spelling/grammar errors that I have possibly made in this chapter--I haven't had time to read through it yet._

_Music for this chapter: 'Ignorance' by Paramore, and 'Pick Up The Pieces', by A Thorn For Every Heart._

* * *

There was a large oak tree that stood outside the house belonging to Eddward Holt. It was very tall, peaking higher than the double story house. It was old and weathered, strips of bark peeling off with the simple summer breeze. The oak was home to a small family of birds. The mother bird lovingly tending to her three hatchlings in the dirty nest high in the branches, all four birds tweeting in happiness.

Kevin couldn't stand it.

The senseless, mind-numbing, repetitive tweets of the new born birds was driving him insane. It burrowed deep into his mind, reminding him of the early hour and why he was awake.

Kevin sat just below the nest of pigeons, his fingers plugged in his ears to prevent blood seeping from them. He was certain that such a noise this early in the morning was a sin, and why he was being punished for it was something he wasn't sure of.

Checking his watch, Kevin saw that it was just past 4:30 a.m. and when he looked back up, he saw the object of his new found infatuation.

Eddward James Holt.

Double Dork.

Kevin remembers that not even one day ago, he only saw the Edd as a passing body. Someone he would go out of his way to barge into whilst walking to his next class at school, someone who sat with his two other friends, someone who wasn't cool enough to even comprehend Kevin's life.

Kevin merely saw Double D as a lower life form, someone meant for his own entertainment, some meaningless dork with an unbelievably intelligent mind, good morals and brilliant loyalty.

Kevin never took this last three things into account before.

Until last night.

Double D had shown himself, fully and wholly. Kevin saw the bright spark leave his eyes, he watched his shoulders sag under the weight of betrayal and watched as salt cascaded down his pale cheeks. Kevin finally saw Double D for who he really was.

A scared seventeen year-old teenager.

Just like himself.

Just like every other junior at Peach creek high school, just like all of Kevin's friends, just like the members of the Biology club, the Footballers, the Math-letes and *Muso's. Double D was and is exactly like every other boy Kevin knows.

Kevin looked down when he heard metal groaning, he saw Double D walking through his side gate. He was a mess. Grey fabric clung to his arms and it almost resembled his shirt. Jeans spattered with blood, dirt and sweat were tattered from his hips, leaving the only amiable peace of clothing on the Edd being his beanie. The beanie Kevin stared at all night, the beanie that prevented Kevin from any sleep.

The beanie that helped him realize who he really was.

Looking down, Kevin ran through the memory fresh in his mind.

He had just slammed his back door on the crumbling Double D, beanie fisted in his clenched hand. He turned all different directions but not place called to him, no place could help him hide for the truth that barreled towards him. Thoughts were being connected in his mind; situations being made clear.

Kevin was about to find himself, and he was scared as hell.

He turned and stormed hurriedly up the hardwood stairs. Placing his hand on the rail, Kevin propelled himself even faster. Once on the next floor, Kevin ignored the dragonfly ornaments that hung off the peach walls, he ignored the Persian rug his father purchased in a drunken gamble. Kevin tried to ignore everything he saw, but he couldn't ignore anything he felt.

The utter _pain _that was radiating off him was tangible. Like and aura projecting from the core of his body. Kevin was sure that if he reached out, his hand would be coated in every liquid that caused pain or soothed pain. Blood, Novocain, morphine, mercury. It would swirl in his palm, and form all of his desires and wants; everything he wants to get the hell away from.

Kevin rushed into his room. Slamming the door shut, he turned and placed his hands against the mahogany wood, trying to barricade his thoughts and feelings away from him. He could hear them pounding against the door, begging, screaming to be let in, to be accepted. But he just _couldn't _let that door open. He couldn't accept this. Not now.

But this wasn't up to him.

He couldn't run forever. He had no choice. This had to happen. And it had to happen _now_.

He fell to his knees, his hands falling from their place. Kevin screwed his eyes shut and gasped in a ragged breath. His arms began to tremble and his shoulder sagged, his knees burnt against the carpet. Salt water dripped from his left eye, his right soon following. This was the lowest Kevin had ever been.

And it nearly killed him.

He didn't know why this hurt so much, why it had all surfaced now. And what exactly had surfaced; he wasn't sure of.

He just kept seeing Double D's face. He kept seeing the tears, he kept seeing his eyes droop, the sparkle leave. He remembers threatening him. He remembers feeling like a complete jerk.

Kevin can't really say what particular memory set off his revelation, nor why his revelation decided to come to light now. He only knew that it was time, and he couldn't unconsciously push it away any longer.

And now, as he stared into Double D's room, watching the Edd sleeping, beanie on his head, a content smile on his face, Kevin knew that he could. He knew it was true, and even if he didn't want it to be, he didn't have a choice. He _never _had a choice.

_I like you Double Dor—,_

He took a deep breath.

_I like you, Double D. I really, _really, _like you._

He cursed under his breath and brought his stinging palms to his eyes, wiping at the salt dew. Kevin tried to grapple at something, tried to release some of the anger and frustration he felt. More than that, he was trying to get out of the tree.

He felt like a stalker, like a crazed psychopath. Almost as if he was going to kidnap Double D and hold him as his prisoner. _'It rubs the lotion on it's skin, or else it gets the hose again.'_

_Damn Silence Of The Lambs. _Kevin thought. _Hate that movie._

Taking one last look at Double D, Kevin silently slipped from his high vigil, landing a little roughly on the ground. He groaned and cradled his ankle, thinking twice about complaining, Kevin remembered the state in which Double D looked, it was obvious that every joint in his body was sprained, and he'd have more than his fair share of bruises tomorrow.

If he ever woke up.

Kevin sighed, trying to think about what to do next, but coming up empty. He settled on the idea that perhaps all of this would go away after he had had a good nights sleep. Perhaps this would all be a dream.

And as he walked home, Kevin had one last thought.

_Why does that scare me so much…?_

* * *

_*Muso - Musician/Music enthusiast._


	9. Chapter 9: Attack

_I'm so sorry that this took me so long. Would you believe me if I told you that I was attacked and held captive by a group of Pirates? No?_

_Ninjas?_

_Zombies?_

_I'm going to be tweaking this chapter for a couple of days, and I'm sorry about any spelling/grammatical errors, I haven't had time to read through it yet._

_The music for this chapter is; "Attack", by 30 Seconds to Mars and "Whoa", by We The Kings._

* * *

Waking up had always been a pleasant experience for Double D. He had become accustomed to the usual happiness he would feel at the prospect of a new day, he had always yearned for the heat of the sun beaming through his window, as it served as another reason to go outside and enjoy his life. But now, as he lay crippled in his bed, he found himself wondering why he didn't close the _damn _curtains.

The sun shone on his face and nearly blinded him with its bright light. He tried to block the sun out with his hand, but found that even the slightest movement would send pain rocketing up and down his entire left arm. He could feel his hair in his eyes and knew that the offending colour would be glowing brightly in the sunlight.

Despite his pain and temporary blindness, Double D let out a content sigh when he felt the warm fabric of his sock-hat still securely planted atop his head. He knew that it wasn't on properly, as more than the tips of his hair at the back were falling into his face. He didn't care.

His cracked lips smiled and his throat burned. He could feel the block at the back of his sinuses and he knew that the ache in his throat was more than dehydration. He didn't have to examine his body to know that it was bruised, battered and practically useless, he could feel it with every breath.

Double D lay in his bed for an immeasurable amount of time, trying to count the hours he had been asleep from his blurry view of the white alarm clock, stagnant on his dresser drawers. It's numbers were glowing red around the black background, the rocket-ship sticker he stuck on it when he was eight still holding on firmly.

Double D tried not to let his mind wander to the events of the past two days. He tried calculating the equations he was given for homework, he tried to think about whether or not he wanted an ant farm again, he tried to wonder about his parents and what they were doing, and he tried to just not think at all, but no matter what he thought, there was always a face lurking in the back of his mind. It wasn't Eddy, nor was it Ed. But the one person he would rather not think about _at all._

Kevin.

Questions ran through his mind. _Did he give me my hat back? Is he going to beat me up tomorrow? Why am I thinking about him? Why can't I _stop _thinking about him?_

_Do I want to?_

Double D had never really felt a 'pull' towards anyone. He, unlike a lot of other seventeen-year-old boys, was not obsessed with sport, alcohol, or even girls. Yes, he'd sometimes see a girl that he'd think of as pretty, and the occasional 'hot', but he never had a… _lust… _for them. He had never thought about it until now.

Double D had a quiet intellect that wove through all branches of education, whit, intelligence and ethics. He had won countless spelling bees in primary school, awards for the science club, chess club and the mathletes. He was the first running to be valedictorian when he and his classmates graduated next year.

Double D couldn't find the solution to this equation. He couldn't find any answers at all.

A thrill of excitement shot down his spine at the thought.

* * *

Double D spent all of Sunday healing from his rough weekend. He counted his bruises, all forty-two of them. He cleaned his cuts, washed the grime from his skin and replenished his lungs with clean air. Double D hadn't realised how utterly suffocated his weekend had been. Every breath of air was tainted with an emotion he had no time for. Betrayal, exhaustion, confusion. Each emotion came with a spiral of colours, swirling down his throat and settling into a light shroud of uneasiness in his stomach.

School began in forty-five minutes, and Double D knew he had to be rid of these emotions before I started. He couldn't show up to face his monsters with a sense of dread. He knew today would be full of manoeuvres and questions, betrayal and fist-fights. Double D wasn't looking forward to school at all, and briefly contemplated skipping just so he wouldn't be subjected to such cruelties.

But he trudged on like a toy soldier. Constantly being moved by someone else's wants, and strategies. He was the pawn on a chess board, easily sacrificed, moving only one place at a time, slow and most of the time steady. Nothing ethnic in his life, and surrounded by larger pieces who could move diagonal to his pace. He watched as the jocks rode horses four paces ahead of him, as the whole school evolved into larger fish in the larger pond. Queens, kings, bishops, knights. They all hopped him. Never sacrificing themselves for the little pawn piece.

His walk to school was relatively painless. He saw no sign of a threat, no Eddy lurking behind a bush, camera in hand. No Kevin waiting for him at the curb, cracking his knuckles and leering with hate. It was just like routine.

How utterly boring it was.

Double D's adrenaline was pumping the entire walk. He kept expecting someone to barrel roll out of a bush or from underneath a car, grab him and run. He kept expecting a well paid associates of Eddy's to grab his beanie and run, and as a result had him pulling it down even further onto his head.

He felt his veins quake under the pressure of his pounding heart, and he had no idea why he suddenly broke into a sweat, feeling a cool shiver run down his spine. Double D could feel eyes on his back. But he had no idea who they belonged to.

They weren't the heat of greed he usually felt when Eddy's stare was upon him, nor the cool calm of Ed. It was an erratic beat of a drum, it was the cool sheen of sweat that lined his forehead, the eyes he could feel where intense yet soft, uncharacteristically caring, and an unneeded, unwanted pulse of their own heart. The eyes upon him where just as confused.

Double D spun to his left, where he could feel his stalker hiding. He saw the hedge in front of a peach-coloured house, and felt the cool breeze as he watched it sway a near-by tree. A car sat idling in the driveway, but it was obvious that it was just heating up, as the driver's seat was clearly empty. The only human being on the other side of the road was Kevin, and his retreating form was slinking quickly down the road, obviously on his way to school.

Double D was confused, to say the least.

The only other person he could see was Kevin, but Double D pushed the thought of his eyes right out of his mind.

_As if Kevin would be staring at me. _

It crippled him, the pain that constricted in his chest.

He couldn't breathe.

He couldn't move.

He could only think.

Images of Kevin ran through his mind, and with it came all the thoughts he had been avoiding since he found his beanie lying on his back porch steps. His emotions were boiling and his thoughts were derailing his mind. He felt exhausted, and his bruises started to ache more than ever. His neck couldn't hold the weight of his head, and his shoulders couldn't bear the weight of the world.

His scraped knees stung and his palms turned and angry red, his eyes wanted to close and Double D found his body laying flat on the cool cement.

Double D knew he was going into shock. All the events from the past days were catching up with him, and every time he saw a new face, it would cut at his chest. Eddy, Kevin, Ed, his Parents. Eddy, Kevin, Ed, his Parents. Eddy.

_Kevin._

He was shaking hard now, pain, exhaustion and terrified thoughts crippling him to the ground.

The heavy breathing of another was the last thing he heard before slipping from consciousness.


	10. Chapter 10: I'm Made Of Wax

_Sorry about the wait . _

_Not long to go now. Let me know what you think ;)_

_Music for this chapter; 'I'm Made Of Wax, Larry, What Are You Made Of?' By A Day To Remember, and 'Romance Is Dead' by Parkway Drive._

* * *

Double D felt himself come back into the world on a lumpy, uncomfortable surface, something he hadn't felt before. There was a noise coming from his right, and it pounded into his skull like a thousand knives.

He felt a tube coming out of his hand, but no pain when he tried to move his limbs. Only exhaustion. He could barely lift them, his eyelids included. Double D momentarily felt a moment of panic when he couldn't recognise the smell or feel of his surroundings. But he quickly calmed himself down when he smelt the calming scent coming from his left.

Double D felt like it had taken him years to open his eyes, and he was sure that he had fallen asleep again after waking up momentarily. But he finally managed to pry his eyes open, only to close them again when he met the soft stare of the bright light above him.

Turning his neck to the right, Double D saw a large piece of machinery that had a tube running from it, and into him. A blue neon line would flash across the screen in time with his breathing. Double D's foggy mind quickly registered the beeping he had heard earlier as the heart monitor.

Inhaling, he caught that smell again. The smell that was calming and soothing enough that it had lulled him to sleep before he could discover its source.

Double D groaned and closed his eyes when he craned his neck to the left. A burning ache shot from the bottom of his spine to the top of his head when he used his still drowsy muscles. As he waited for the ache to subside, Double D heard footsteps echoing through the room, getting closer to him.

Peeking one eye open, the Ed saw a tall, lean boy wearing black cargo shorts and running shoes with a plain white shirt and the latest popular brand in the fashion of hats. His muscles were defined and stretched nicely under his skin, which was glowing from sweat.

Opening his other eye, Double D looked up.

Kevin.

_Kevin? _

"You're awake," the larger boy grunted, shifting on his feet uncomfortably.

"Yeah…" Replied Eddward in a slight quiver, his eyes never leaving the dark pools of Kevin's. His point black irises shook him to the core, making him sweat with unknown emotions. He didn't see the usual raw look of disgust in Kevin's eyes, or malicious intent of making someone else's life hell.

Double D couldn't name the foreign emotions in the opposite boys eyes; no matter how much he wanted, _needed _to know.

"How're you feeling?"

Feeling the weight of sleep all around him, Double D let his eyes slip shut. "Why do you care?"

"I don't know."

The silence rang clear and high. It enveloped Edd, and pulled his arms into tight bindings. His anxiety was sparking, his mind was running and his pores clamoured with sweat.

_You don't know? What can you not know?_

It wasn't until Kevin answered that Double D realised he had spoken his thoughts aloud.

"It isn't that easy." Kevin all but whispered.

"_What _isn't that easy, Kevin? Is it realising that you have been traumatizing me since I was nine? Is it realising, finally, that Naz doesn't want you? Is it realising that you're a brute, and will get nothing out of your life if you continue acting how you are?"

During his little tirade, Double D didn't open his eyes. He didn't raise or lower his voice. He didn't flinch or try to run away. He didn't do anything but lay in his hospital bed, mulling over the harsh words he had thrown at Kevin.

Who was now rising from his post at Double D's side, and storming out of the sterile room.

Before Double D could register the severity of what he had said, sleep over took him, and lulled him into an uneasy rest.

* * *

Kevin fumed down the hallways of Peach Creek general hospital. His face got tighter with every heavy footstep that pounded the linoleum, and his chest was aching for reasons unknown. The foreign feeling made every step he took harder, every breath shallower, every blink of an eye seem like a century, and every tear that gathered in his eyes all the more ridiculous.

_This is some weird kind of heart attack, I know it._

Kevin finally managed to break his way through the sickness that floated through the hospital halls and into the outside world. Cigarette smoke littered his nostrils, and he wrinkled his nose against the odd sensation.

Kevin let his fists relax as he walked over to a park bench. He shook his hands out as he started to feel the prickling sensation of the blood returning to his fingers. Kevin paused for a moment, sitting still as a statue in the middle of suburban chaos. Sirens screamed through his ears, accompanied by a falsetto of agonising wails. His vision was spattered with blood that was not his own, watching as a fatally ill man was wheeled into the ER.

The blood, the screaming, the sirens, the smoke.

Kevin's senses were alive, wired like a hot rod ready to explode. But they didn't. Everything Kevin saw, everything he smelt and heard. It was all taken down his body, through his veins, and into his chest.

_What the hell is wrong with me?_

The pressure around his heart clenched in one fell swoop. The ache was murdering his veins, and sent pain rippling through his body. It curled his fingers and tore at his eyelids. Tears streaked down his face as he thought of what Double D had said.

_Double D…_

"_Why do you care?"_

_Because in a matter of hours, you helped me find myself._

"_You don't know?"_

_I'm not sure._

"_What can you not know?"_

_I do know. You wouldn't understand. You wouldn't want me back._

_You __**couldn'**__t want me back._

* * *

Double D wrung his hands out in worry. He had only managed to get a half hour of sleep before the butterflies in his stomach woke him up, their incessant fluttering doing nothing to soothe his bruises.

His mind was running away from him. Visions of Kevin punching Ed in his rage of what Double D had said tainted his mind. A mirage of Kevin, stranded in his bedroom, the outside world not understanding…

Double D hated the words he spoke to the brute with every fibre of his being.

But he didn't regret them.

The Edd couldn't discern as to _why _the words cut at his chest. He could only tell that when they did, his whole body started to ache.

Eddward Holt didn't know what he was feeling, or why he was feeling it. But he was determined to find out.


End file.
